NO NEWSPAPER

by Sonne T. Hart on March 14, 2011

(Before writing projects, before facing the world, it’s tea and the paper)

 

Tea, paper and a favorite chair, this is the way any morning should begin, especially Monday morning. Most of you out there know the significance of Monday starting off good. Now that we have that established, on with the paper tale. It is Monday morning 7:00 a.m. my tea is ready, steaming in the cup, so I step outside to grab the paper and to my utter disappointment and despair NO PAPER! A call to the newspaper office is in order.

Over the years my paper has been left at the wrong condo door, the wrong floor, and just plain not left at all. In the beginning, the news office sent someone right out with the paper, but as time passed that nicety passed too. A couple of months ago when I told the representative my carrier had missed me, I thought I’d heard the gem of all gems, when she asked, “Do you have a computer?” Oh dear I thought, I don’t like where this is heading. Yes, I replied hesitantly. “Well then read it online.”  READ IT ON LINE! I won’t go into the details of my reply, I’ll only ask, “have you ever worked a crossword puzzle on a computer screen?”

Last Monday was the straw that broke the camel’s back. The lady rep told me it was too late to bring the paper. I pay six months in advance for a newspaper to be delivered to my door every morning, (barring a tragedy). That’s every day to my door – my door, not someone else’s door, and not tomorrow, and especially not at all. I like to think that I’m a reasonable person, but when she said it was too late, I lost it. “You are kidding aren’t you?” I asked. To which she replied, “I really don’t know what to tell you.”  I thought this over for a nano second and said, “I know what to tell you, cancel my subscription!”

 

Did I cut my nose off to spite my face? Probably, because as you might have guessed by now, I have no morning paper. I have to get dressed, ride the elevator down six stories, get in my car, and drive a half mile to the paper machine to purchase one. That requires fifty cents – two quarters. So, I’m down to the last two coins, and this is classic, the machine swallows the quarters and the darn door won’t open. No paper, no news, and no answers to yesterday’s crossword puzzle.

Is this where a person stands on good ole principle and hopes it teaches the newspaper company a lesson, or is it the other way around? Did that five seconds of ‘self gratification’ allow me to win a little battle, but ultimately the newspaper office wins the war? What do you think? Tell me folks, what would you do?

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